Remote Meetings (Liz and Joan)

The coronavirus pandemic is a difficult time for seniors and older buds, but not just because they're more at risk. With more and more places on lockdown or in quarantine or under stay-at-home orders, our daily routines are replaced with phone calls, remote work and video conferencing. Several older buds are familiar with using the internet, social media, and conferencing, but many of them aren't. Some of them don't know how to use these and others prefer in-person interaction. Nonetheless, it's the older buds who can't move everything online who are left behind.

Yesterday, I called older bud Joan on the phone. Both her daughters have been providing her with groceries and regularly calling her, and she's been able to exercise on her apartment's fire escape. Both her daughters also bought her four jigsaw puzzles for her to finish during the lockdown, and she has crosswords and word search puzzles to keep her mind sharp. The one thing she hasn't been able to do was go to church.

Joan's a devout Christian, and the Church was the only one who helped her when her husband abused her. Mass and Bible-study are an essential part of her life. Luckily, her church is holding its masses and Bible study sessions through Zoom. Joan doesn't use Zoom, but her church gave her a phone number so she could call into the meeting. She told me that she'd much prefer to go to church in person than call in, but she's willing to give it a try.

I've heard this from older buds inside and outside Best Day. The public sphere is important to them, and chatrooms or video streams just aren't the same, so what do they do? Do they plunge into teleconferencing, often for the very first time? Do they throw caution to the wind and meet in person? Or do they wait it out for who knows how long. As a blogger, I encourage all older buds to move online, but I also know that takes a lot of time and hard work.

In the meantime, we're still moving forward and transcribing the older buds' stories. We hope you enjoy this piece from older buds Liz and Joan:

Liz Abrams

03.12.2020

What Do You Know About Where You Live

Relocating to South Philly central, I felt out of place. The apartment building I live was occupied by older Americans who lived, educated, married, raised their children & grandchildren, They were Longtime neighbors with their own memories, schools, families, speech patterns, familiar with all things that matter, entertainment, all the events that usually keep people in their comfort zone. It would be the same for me but unfortunately in my home neighborhood of North Philly has been devastated by Temple University Corporation. My home where I was born, was razed and demolished, once a 3 story apt building is now a vacant lot for abandoned cars. No homes are for sale, since they were purchased in the 80’s in the city & developers agreement sold to Temple University, for Temple student housing & apts, rentals stadiums and the like.

My new home in South Philly, getting used to my new neighbors, changed overnight, all I see today, miraculously is the same people I left in the suburbs white people, career, & students, condos dogs & bikes, - no children, no folks sitting on steps conversing. Just new people for this new city called Phila/ The Land of the Gentry

Which I guess includes me

Joan Bunting

02.20.2020

Heaven

                  Heaven is where I want to be, when I leave

this troubled world.

                  Where peace, joy, and happiness lies

with gates made of pearls. 

                  There are thousands and thousands of angels there

singing praises to the Lord.

                  And I’ll eagerly join The choir where we’ll all

be on one accord.

                  There’ll be no more crying, dying heartbreak or

pain.

                  There will only be peace in heaven where my

Jesus reign.

                  Just to see His face, kneel at his feet to give

praise and thanks for All He’s done for me,

                  For saving my soul, for making me whole, for

dying on Calvary.

As always, keep in touch with the important people in your life, especially the older buds. If you can't be there in person, please call them, email them, or message them on social media. If they're using teleconferencing or remote events for the first time, give them a call and help them set things up. Check in on them to see how well they're getting used to these programs.
You can share your older buds' stories through our portal right here, and you can volunteer as a transcriber (completely remotely) by emailing us at info@bestdayofmylifesofar.org. If you're an older bud yourself, you can share your story through this portal right here. And if you're just plain passionate about supporting older buds and ending senior isolation, then like us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and share links to your favorite stories. And check us out on 6ABC news, too! Thanks for reading.

Curated by Caitlin Cieri

New Transcriber (José and Ann)

Good news everyone! We have a new transcriber for Best Day who is working on our backlog of stories. This means that more recent stories will be posted on the blog more quickly. To celebrate, I'd like to show off the two most recently transcribed stories:

José Dominguez

02.20.2020

Sofia Teaching Her Granpa (That’s Me)

Last year at the beginning of spring I was taking Sofia my granddaughter ( 4 years old) to her school at 8:30a.m., I was in a hurry because I had to arrive at 9:00. So we initiated our drive walking to the east to 20^th street.  After walking several steps Sofia suddenly stopped herself.  “What happen?  Why do you stop?”  I told her.  “Look Pepe look on the sidewalk.”  And I saw a little bird laying death, the eyes closed, lying on its back legs crimped, so small that almost was unnoticed, to me, but not to Sofia.

“Come on let’s hurry!” 

“No Pepe, tell me what happened to him?”

“I don’t know perhaps he was very old, or was hit by a car, or had some illness, how am I going to know?”

“But we can not let him there.” 

“What? Do you want to take it with you?”

Her face was transformed and in her eyes I saw the trace of tears.

“No I will not move” she concluded. 

“Ok let me throw it to the garbage” I replied.

What?  “No Pepe, no I don’t want to”

“Then what can we do?”  Her sad face turned into a very serious gesture and she said:

“My mom told me that flowers grow beautiful when the soil that surround them is rich of plant food, and mom told me that when you bury animal corpses in it the soil becomes food for the plants.”

“Meaning what Sofia?”

“Well we can take the little birdy into our tree pot near the flowers so they will grow beautiful.“

Solemnly I took the corpse and Sofia helped me to give the little fellow a decent burial.  When all was done we continue our trip to school.  She was very happy and didn’t stop speaking about the birdy, the possible death causes, how the flowers were to be fed and at one point she stopped and solemnly told me “You know Pepe, that little bird is going to help also the butterflies because if our flowers become beautiful with birdy they will feed many butterflies, I’m so happy.”

 

Ann Von Densen

02.20.2020

Life of Toby

This is the story of Toby, a beagle-pug mix who was adopted by my daughter Kerry from Morris Animal Refuge in 2009.  It soon became apparent that Toby enjoyed attention and affection from females only when we were sitting on the grass in Rittenhouse Square.  While tail wagging at the women who approached him, he quickly ran behind Kerry and started shaking when a man approached in the same way.  Obviously, two year old Toby’s interactions with men had been less than kind.  Around this time, Kerry started dating Gabe.  Eventually, Gabe became the first man that Toby wagged his tail for.  Being a believer in doggie instinct, I took this as a positive recommendation and was quite happy when Gabe & Kerry became engaged As time went on, I began to think of Toby as Buddha-Dog.  He had a calm nature, happy to sit up straight, slowly moving his head back & forth as he observed his environment.  If you started petting him he would slowly lean into you as if he was returning the affection

Then, my grandson Max arrived and suddenly Toby went down a rung or two on the family ladder.  Taking it all in stride, Toby gently sniffed the tiny human who now occupied his former place on the couch.  Soon, he’d sleep beside Max on the couch & the floor.  Then as Max gained mobility & began crawling over, beside & next to Toby, he would calmly wag his tail.  As years passed & Max gave Toby full body hugs & began to pretend Toby was a pony instead of a dog, Buddha dog continued to take it in stride as dog & boy became best friends.

A few more years past & Toby, now 12 years old began to have health issues- the biggest of which was failing eye sight.  But as usual, Toby soldiered on & figured out the routes from living room to kitchen, dining room to stairs & front door to the corner hydrant.  Max & I began playing “find me Toby” in which we would clap & yell find me Toby!  until the dog happily sniffed his way to our feet receiving dog treats & hugs in returns.

In the past few months Toby’s health deteriorated quickly & Kerry & Gabe tried to prepare Max for the inevitable.  Casually, he would tell me, “Toby is going to die soon, and when he does I’m going to get a fish."

But, reality bites, and last Tuesday night Toby died at home as Gabe, the first man he ever trusted held him.  Max found out the next day & apparently cried thru bedtime.  When I saw him the day after he was still sad but was resuming 5 yr old activities When I saw him yesterday he asked me if I’d like to meet his new fish, Circle.  Life goes on, but I’m sure Max will always remember his first dog Toby with love. 

Also, you might have noticed a picture of one of the older buds above. That's a Socially Isolated Senior Selfie!
I'm going around asking older buds to send their selfies to keep in the spirit of our usual Best Day workshops. Take a page from their book and keep in touch with the important people in your life, especially the older buds. If you can't be there in person, please call them, email them, or message them on social media. You can share their stories through our portal right here, and you can volunteer as a transcriber (completely remotely) by emailing us at info@bestdayofmylifesofar.org. And if you're just plain passionate about supporting older buds and ending senior isolation, then like us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and share links to your favorite stories. Thanks for reading.

Curated by Caitlin Cieri

Cleaning House (Michael aka Man-Tin)

I'm lucky enough to be able to work from home, and since I can't use public transit for the time being, I have some time on my hands. I remember a few years ago, older bud Mo McCooper asked me to check for unpublished stories by some of his friends. One such friend was Man-Tin "Michael" Chan, so I went through Best Day's digital attic and found a couple of his old stories. I don't want to overwhelm the readers, so I figured I'd post a sampling of five stories for now:

Michael Chan Man-Tin

7.15.2010

My Story

My name is Chan Man-Tin, Michael.  I was born in Shanghai China. By 1933 I was in Hong Kong.  By the year 1950 I learned Cantonese. After a few years I can speak Cantonese or English to make friends.

I started my garment factory to make different garments which were ordered by overseas customers for 20 years.

Finally I changed my work to become a stock broker for 15 years and then I retired.

I came to join my daughters’s family.  Four years ago I retired from the Securities company and in 2006 joined my daughter and her family.  I sent them here for education in the year 1970.

Now I am retired and enjoy my personal life peacefully.

Michael Chan Man-Tin

8.19.2010

It’s Thursday Again

Time flies, it’s Thursday again. I really do not know what I have done for the last week.

I feel the weather is so good for us here—humid when you working in the office or not. Our feeling is good and enjoy the surrounding so good.

Best wishes and regards to all of us to meet together.

Good day for all of us.

Michael Chan Man-Tin

1.6.2011

Happy Times

2nd of January is my birthday of 82 years! It gives me joy to have a very happy time on that day. It makes me feel wonderful during the day. Early in the morning, every member of my family said some good wishes for me which made me so happy!  I personally have to thank God who gives me a good and happy life to be here with members of our group to enjoy the party. 

I sincerely want to thank all of my friends and relatives who share the happy times on this occasion!

Michael Chan Man-Tin

2.10.2011

Happiness

Time passes very quickly. I have been here for six years already. 

From the beginning, I was afraid to face the problem. After a few months, I begin to feel active to make friends with the American friends in the Senior Center. 

I feel very happy to enjoy life myself with the Senior Center in town to share the happiness with all of us. 

Now it is the Chinese New Year and time to celebrate the Year of the Rabbit and enjoy the happy life for the year. 

Michael Chan Man-Tin

4.26.2012

Returning to My Own Country

It seem quite a long time to not see our club members and I hope all of us will be good for the holidays. I have returned to my mother-town to see my relatives and friends in Hong Kong for 2 weeks. The weather over there is very good during the summer time and all members of the families. We felt to a happy to get together and special for young persons, they grow up very quickly. 

I have a very good feeling for the young members of my family, and hope to meet them again on my next trip.

Best regards to all our members.

Also, you might have noticed a few pictures of the older buds above. These are our Socially Isolated Senior Selfies! I'm going around asking older buds to send their selfies to keep in the spirit of our usual Best Day workshops. Take a page from their book and keep in touch with the important people in your life, especially the older buds. If you can't be there in person, please call them, email them, or message them on social media. You can share their stories through our portal right here, and you can volunteer as a transcriber (completely remotely) by emailing us at info@bestdayofmylifesofar.org. And if you're just plain passionate about supporting older buds and ending senior isolation, then like us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and share links to your favorite stories. Thanks for reading.

Curated by Caitlin Cieri

Maintaining Connections During Social Distancing (Jewel, Philip, and Aparecida)

Hundreds of thousands of businesses are closing down for two weeks, and people all over the United States are working from home and practicing social isolation. Philadelphia is no exception and Best Day will not be meeting in person for the next two weeks at least. Best Day is committed to ending senior isolation, especially during difficult times such as these. We will continue to share the stories of our older buds and keep in touch with them, without compromising their health.

Older buds are most at risk during this period, not just because of the virus but because of the isolation, loss of community centers and the difficulty in getting supplies. There is a lot you can do to help the older buds in your life, even if you can't be there in person. Call them at least once a week to check in on them and see what supplies they need. Arrange to have those delivered to them in a way that won't expose them to the coronavirus. And once you've done that, talk to them. Talk to them through FaceTime, Zoom, Google Hangouts, Facebook, and good old fashioned telephones. Ask them how their day was, ask them for that one story from their childhood, ask them for that one recipe you never got to write down. But most importantly, listen to them. Let them know you're there, and let them know you care.

For today's blog post, I want to showcase three stories about hope and community, from three unique older buds:

Jewel Grace
10.10.19
Bump In the Night

I am a walking miracle. I have survived two kidney transplants, bipolar disorder, and many panic attacks. How? You might ask. With determination, grit, art, music, friends, a loving congregation, my higher power - Goddess, consciousness, talented therapists, untalented therapists. So... We are all mirrors for each other, everyone is a student and a teacher. And most of all, I have leaned to accept myself just the way I am.

And that (just like the Beatles predicted) the only way to change anything is by loving it.

Philip Pai
10.17.19
God In My Daily Life

I was born in mainland China, and grew up in Hong Kong. My parents were Catholic, me too. When I was young, I attended Catholic school. Therefore, in my mind, I just knew God which is the Almighty God. Sometimes, when I have difficulties, I pray for God, then I know how to do. I remembered when I attended a Sunday mass to worship God, the priest said that where is God? Where in heaven? He said heaven is in front of you. Where is hell? It is also in front of you. In our daily life, if you treat people kindly, people will love you. If you treat people not good, they will not like you, therefore heave and hell is not so far. It is in your mind. After, if I have hard times, I will talk to God and pray to God who will direct me. So everyday I pray in the morning and read the bible that gives me lots of word from God. Sometimes, I think that God reflects in the human beings life. God also gives us everything in our daily life. Most of God's words come from the bible. If we love God, we should "love" the person who knows how to love around us, such as family, friends, relatives, etc. There are other words "happy" is also very important. I am so glad that God gives me so many things from the Bible in the daily life. 


Aparecida De Souza
10.17.19
A Quality I Loved About My Father

My father was one of the most peaceful persons that I ever knew or met. He was always calm, never seemed to get angry about anything, and never ever beat his children. I don't think there was even a conflict in his life that he wouldn't have faced and solved, always good naturally, or sometimes, jokingly. One such occasion, as I remember, and I was no more than 4 or 5 years old - this has impressed me so much that I could never forget it: My father had sold one of his horses to a man that lived 2 or 3 farms away from our place. The buyer had not made any parents to and a long time passed without the family hearing from him One of my uncles (my mother's brother) sent word to the man that he should come and pay his debt to my family or he would "do I don't know what." Soon after that, one day, the man showed up at our porch - I remember, the scene - everyone was outside meeting him. One funny thing is that he had left the horse way up on one side of the road, very far. He came in no friendly mood, screaming and saying that he refused and was not going to pay anything to anybody! My uncle followed, exchanging words and screaming at him the same way, and at no time jumped to personal aggression, ready to hit him. My father threw himself between the two and simply said: If it takes a fight to solve the problem, forget about it: I pardon you, you don't owe me anything - the horse is yours!

Once again, please keep in touch with the older buds in your life. If you can't be there in person, please call them, email them, or message them on social media. You can share their stories through our portal right here, and you can volunteer as a transcriber (completely remotely) by emailing us at info@bestdayofmylifesofar.org. And if you're just plain passionate about supporting older buds and ending senior isolation, then like us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and share links to your favorite stories. Thanks for reading.

Curated by Caitlin Cieri