Spring Holidays (Eleanor, Nouria, Delores, Ann)

Silly me! In all the time I spent blogging, working with new transcribers, and working with Best Day to rejig the workshops, I completely forgot to wish everyone a Happy Easter, a Happy Orthodox Easter too, a Ramadan Mubarak, and a Happy Passover. To make up for it, here's a collection of spring holidays and surprises, including one new set of Easter memories from Ann.

Eleanor Kazdan
10.25.2018
The Seder Plate

When my grandparents died, my mother asked me if I would like a memento. I looked through the few faded old things she showed me before choosing a chipped and well-used metal Seder plate, dark turquoise and faded gold. This Seder plate brought me back to my childhood and memories of my grandparents. The were Polish Jewish Yiddish-speaking immigrants who settled in Montreal in the 1920s after escaping anti-Semitism and pogroms in eastern Europe.
My earliest childhood memories are of a dusty, small apartment, filled with the smells of Jewish cooking – brisket with prunes and apricots, potato latkes, homemade applesauce, honey cake. My grandparents, Moses and Anna, had thick Yiddish accents.

Back to the Seder plate – The most exciting event of the year was the large family gathering that my grandparents had on Passover. My mother, her four brothers and their families would all descend on the small apartment. A long folding table took up the entire living and dining room with room for me and my three brothers and myriad aunts, uncles and cousins.

The Seder seemed to last for hours as my grandfather read the story of Passover. The Seder plate held the symbols of the Jews’ oppression and hardships in their 40-year exile in Egypt. Bitter herbs and unleavened bread. Even the children drank sweet red wine.

My Seder plate conjures up these sweet memories as I do my own, much shorter version of a Seder every year.

Nouria Bennouna

11.29.2017

Two Weeks With An American Family

Back in 1999, my oldest daughter (Ghada) graduated from highs school in Casablana, Morocco, and she wanted to come to the United States, Florida for the university. I came with my three other kids to prepare for her arrival.

One time I was driving with my youngest daughter (Emma) by a church and I saw that they were giving classes. I stopped and began to write the schedule at this time a minister (Gary) came. He told us that they didn’t give English classes (what I thought) but bible classes. Then he asked where we ere from, what language we were speaking. When he knew we spoke French, he was excited because his daughter (Heather) who was the same age as my oldest daughter Ghada, just began a French class in high school. He then called her and asked her to come meet us. She came and after that, he invited us to have dinner in his house, he called his wife Tammy and told her to make dinner. “We have guests” he said. He came with me to the motel to tell my other daughter (Sanaa) and my son (Amine). We had a good time at dinner, he took us to visit every corner of his big and beautiful house. Downstairs, they had attached to the house, a little apartment where his mother-in-law used to live.

After dinner, he asked me how long I’m going to stay in the US. I said two weeks. Then he said, what do you think about living with us these two weeks in the little apartment. I was very happy and accepted his suggestion. He gave me the keys of his house and we went the same night to the motel to take our stuff. We spent two weeks with them.

After dinner the 2nd or 3rd day, I asked him, how did he know to trust me at this point, to give me his house keys the same day we met, even though he didn’t know anything about me or my family. He didn’t have any proof of my background. He said that he worked with a lot of people and could know the sincerity of someone after talking with him. 

Delores Wilson
01.11.2019
Easter Sunday Surprise

Our request was made by my two brothers and myself for three baby chicks for Easter.
At that period of time time, it was allowed to dye baby chicks for Easter. My mom said yes. She approached us again and asked if we preferred to dye easter eggs instead. We said we wanted to dye baby chickens. My mom said okay but we must keep the basement clean, spick and span. that was one of the most exciting experience we had – we each had our own baby chick.
Easter was early that year, it was in March instead of April. It was common knowledge that baby chicks that were dyed had a short life span. Well, I want to tell you, as the weeks turned into months, they began to lose their feathers and new feathers were growing in.
My mom and dad, both Southerners, were amazed. They didn’t think our chicks would last two weeks. Well, we had a rooster, and he woke my father up at 4:00 am every morning and two hens.
I overheard my mom on the phone saying, “I didn’t expect the chicks to last that long.” Her Easter surprise!

   

Ann Von Densen

04.25.2019

Easter Memories

My childhood Easter memories included Baskets filled with chocolate bunnies and jelly beans, brightly colored eggs about to transform into egg salad, dresses with petticoats that rustled when you moved, church service filled with sweet smelling flowers & sweet smelling mothers with conflicting perfume scents resulting in lots of sneezes.

But my biggest Easter memory, for better or worse, is going to Easter dinner at Uncle Howards and Aunt Mary Margarets.  Howard was my fathers half brother more than 20 years his senior.  He was the wealthy relative who worked on Wall Street, lived in a high rise apartment with lots of oriental rugs and enjoyed cigars and women, & liquor.  Aunt Mary Margaret was Howards 4^th wife much to the chagrin of my mother and other aunts who were still very fond of wife #3, Mona, currently working as a waitress in NYC. 

Now Uncle Howard never had children and although he was pleasant to my sister, me, and our 2 girl cousins upon our Easter arrival it was obvious that he was not entirely comfortable.  Aunt Mary Margaret (MM for short) made no attempt to talk to us beyond “hello, girls” as she ushered us into the t.v. room, turned the t.v. on to Roller Derby handed us a basket of jelly bean-filled Easter eggs & cracked a smile as she shut the door behind her. None of us had any aspirations to compete in the roller derby occupying the tv screen, so we were forced to consider other forms of entertainment.  Our favorite activity was to write, “help! we are being held captive in apt 4c!” on strips of paper placed in the plastic eggs & dropping them out the window to the courtyard below.  If anyone found our message in this day and age a swat team probably would have shown up, but we never received any response to our messages. 

We also did our share of snooping, and one year we hit pay dirt – as we pulled a box from the closet filled with Playboy magazines.  As we flipped thru those pages, we were shocked, appalled, somewhat disgusted and quite intimidated and concerned over own lack of development so far.  Overall, it was a horribly unhealthy and unrealistic way to begin our sexual development, but it sure filled up the time!

When we heard MM’s high heels clicking down the hall, we quickly slid the box under the table.  She arrived with t.v. trays adorned w/ her yearly canned pear bunny salad & pre portioned Easter dinner.

We were too young to appreciate the irony of eating our bunny salad as studied the playmate bunnies.

We knew our visit was coming to an end when we were summoned into the dining room to actually join the adults for dessert – (MM’s traditional egg shaped vanilla cake decorated with jelly beans). This was also about the time that Uncle Howard’s many martinis became apparent as he began commenting on his sister-in-laws gorgeous legs & cleavage. So before you knew it we were on our way home, free from Howard & MM for another year.

There's lots of different ways to keep in touch with the older buds in your life. If you can't be there in person, please call them, email them, or message them on social media. And if they're using teleconferencing or remote events for the first time, give them a call and help them set things up. Check in on them to see how well they're getting used to these programs. You can share your older buds' stories through our portal right here, and you can volunteer as a transcriber (completely remotely) by emailing us at info@bestdayofmylifesofar.org. If you're an older bud yourself, you can share your story through this portal right here. And if you're just plain passionate about supporting older buds and ending senior isolation, then like us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and share links to your favorite stories. And check us out on 6ABC news, too! Thanks for reading.

Curated by Caitlin Cieri

Keeping Up (Carolyn and Philip)

Good afternoon, everyone. Some of you may have noticed our Socially Distant Senior Selfies these past few weeks. I intended them to be a way to keep our Senior Selfie tradition going, and a safe way to see how Best Day's older buds are doing. However, you may have also noticed that the selfies are of the same four older buds. That's because not every older bud is comfortable with sharing their photos outside of Senior Selfies. Some of them aren't sure how to take selfies, and some of them are a bit more cautious about sharing their photos online. so I'm thinking of other ways for everyone to keep up with their older buds. Maybe a sentence from each bud to say how they're doing, maybe stories submitted during the shelter-in-place order, maybe something else entirely. And if you want to get in touch with your favorite older buds in a special way, you can always send them a note.

No matter what you do, don't forget to read and share the older buds' stories. After all, this humble blog reunited a mother and daughter not too long ago:

Carolyn Boston
04.11.2019
The Shofuso Japanese House and Garden

                  Last week my great niece and I took a tour of the Shofuso Japanese House and Garden located in the West Philadelphia section of Fairmount Park.  I planned for many years to visit the Shofuso Japanese House and Garden but never had the opportunity to do so.

            The serenity and elegance of the Shofuso House with its many waterfalls, rock gardens and weeping willow trees left me with a sense of peace and tranquility.  I was transported to 17^th century Japan and experienced the simplicity and beauty of this Japanese house. 

            The first thing required is to remove your shoes before entering the house.  The tour guide explained every facet and function of the house.  She thoroughly explained the ritual of the tea ceremony and what all the gestures represent. 

            For an experience away from the stress of life and a view of an entirely different lifestyle and an environment yields a restoration of mind, body and spirit, I would highly recommend a visit the Shofuso Japanese House and Garden.

Philip Pai

04.11.2019

The Story About Myself

I was born in Hunan China. When I was young, I follow my parents to escape mainland to Hong Kong in order escape being killed by Communists. I attend the primary school and secondary school at Hong Kong then went to Taiwan to attend the college over there. Then back to Hong Kong I get B.A. degree at the University of Taiwan. 

When I was at Hong Kong I get teachers job at then I taught at school many year. Then move to United States in order to help my uncle’s restaurant which located at North Phila. But my uncle’s restaurant business is not so good.  He sold the restaurant. Then I get a job from my uncle’s friend.  I worked there as manager many years.  I like my job so much though the salary is not so good, but still can help my family.

I like study bible, and go to church, when I have spare time.

There's lots of different ways to keep in touch with the older buds in your life. If you can't be there in person, please call them, email them, or message them on social media. And if they're using teleconferencing or remote events for the first time, give them a call and help them set things up. Check in on them to see how well they're getting used to these programs. You can share your older buds' stories through our portal right here, and you can volunteer as a transcriber (completely remotely) by emailing us at info@bestdayofmylifesofar.org. If you're an older bud yourself, you can share your story through this portal right here. And if you're just plain passionate about supporting older buds and ending senior isolation, then like us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and share links to your favorite stories. And check us out on 6ABC news, too! Thanks for reading.
Curated by Caitlin Cieri

What to Do (Eleanor and Joan)

Everyone's experience with the lockdowns, quarantines, and stay-at-home orders is different. Some people are sluggish, some people are anxious, some people are depressed, some people are calm until they start worrying if they're too calm, and some people can't even stay at home. However, this isn't the only crisis we've been through in our lives, and it can help to look back on other stories of disaster or confusion to see what kept people going. With that in mind, I've included two stories of older buds and how they got through their crises:

Eleanor Kazdan

04.11.2019

Judith

                  My mother Judith was always eccentric and difficult to get along with. She also cried a lot when I was a child.  I realized when I was older that she suffered from depression.  Our family was a hotbed of arguing and yelling.  My mother was never happy or satisfied.

                  When my mother was 47, she and my father met my brothers’ high school athletic coach, Sy Mah.  He had a radical idea that adults should get in shape by running. 

Both of my parents began running.  The year was 1967.  People stared at them on the street and made rude comments.  I remember that my mother went from hardly being able to run around the block to running a mile.  Then 2, 5, 10 miles.  Then running a marathon.  And another marathon.

She was no longer depressed.  Running became her life.  Training, running 6 miles a day, mentoring other older runners.  There were many awards, trophies, and magazine articles. 

Judith ran 37 marathons all over the world until she was 80. 

She was a great inspiration to me and many others!

Joan Bunting

04.11.2019

The Best Things I Learned In My Life

                  In my lifetime I’ve learned many things.

                  For instance I’ve learned to do unto others as I would like others to treat me. I’ve also learned to be respectful and considerate of others.  I was taught how to carry myself as a lady, love my enemies even though it can be very, very hard to love someone who has hurt you.

                  I’ve also learned to share even if I only have a little or its my last.  How to be a good listener, that’s how you learn.  Also everyone is not your friend.

                  I’m still learning how to keep my mouth shut sometimes, because when I’m trying to tell someone a truth about something and they’re not able to accept the truth, I’m accused of being a little know it all.

                  Sometimes when I’m talking I have to explain every small detail.  I’ve always been a talker around those I feel comfortable with. 

                  But to make a long story short, I’ve learned to love --- my creator with all my heart, mind and soul. 

                  One of my biggest lessons I’ve learned in this life is, to just at all times, to be myself.

If you're feeling frustrated and uncertain about how to deal with this crisis, try asking an older bud for advice. They've been through a lot and they've picked up some tips in the process. If you can't be there in person, please call them, email them, or message them on social media. And if they're using teleconferencing or remote events for the first time, give them a call and help them set things up. Check in on them to see how well they're getting used to these programs. You can share your older buds' stories through our portal right here, and you can volunteer as a transcriber (completely remotely) by emailing us at info@bestdayofmylifesofar.org. If you're an older bud yourself, you can share your story through this portal right here. And if you're just plain passionate about supporting older buds and ending senior isolation, then like us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and share links to your favorite stories. And check us out on 6ABC news, too! Thanks for reading.

Curated by Caitlin Cieri

Remote Meetings (Liz and Joan)

The coronavirus pandemic is a difficult time for seniors and older buds, but not just because they're more at risk. With more and more places on lockdown or in quarantine or under stay-at-home orders, our daily routines are replaced with phone calls, remote work and video conferencing. Several older buds are familiar with using the internet, social media, and conferencing, but many of them aren't. Some of them don't know how to use these and others prefer in-person interaction. Nonetheless, it's the older buds who can't move everything online who are left behind.

Yesterday, I called older bud Joan on the phone. Both her daughters have been providing her with groceries and regularly calling her, and she's been able to exercise on her apartment's fire escape. Both her daughters also bought her four jigsaw puzzles for her to finish during the lockdown, and she has crosswords and word search puzzles to keep her mind sharp. The one thing she hasn't been able to do was go to church.

Joan's a devout Christian, and the Church was the only one who helped her when her husband abused her. Mass and Bible-study are an essential part of her life. Luckily, her church is holding its masses and Bible study sessions through Zoom. Joan doesn't use Zoom, but her church gave her a phone number so she could call into the meeting. She told me that she'd much prefer to go to church in person than call in, but she's willing to give it a try.

I've heard this from older buds inside and outside Best Day. The public sphere is important to them, and chatrooms or video streams just aren't the same, so what do they do? Do they plunge into teleconferencing, often for the very first time? Do they throw caution to the wind and meet in person? Or do they wait it out for who knows how long. As a blogger, I encourage all older buds to move online, but I also know that takes a lot of time and hard work.

In the meantime, we're still moving forward and transcribing the older buds' stories. We hope you enjoy this piece from older buds Liz and Joan:

Liz Abrams

03.12.2020

What Do You Know About Where You Live

Relocating to South Philly central, I felt out of place. The apartment building I live was occupied by older Americans who lived, educated, married, raised their children & grandchildren, They were Longtime neighbors with their own memories, schools, families, speech patterns, familiar with all things that matter, entertainment, all the events that usually keep people in their comfort zone. It would be the same for me but unfortunately in my home neighborhood of North Philly has been devastated by Temple University Corporation. My home where I was born, was razed and demolished, once a 3 story apt building is now a vacant lot for abandoned cars. No homes are for sale, since they were purchased in the 80’s in the city & developers agreement sold to Temple University, for Temple student housing & apts, rentals stadiums and the like.

My new home in South Philly, getting used to my new neighbors, changed overnight, all I see today, miraculously is the same people I left in the suburbs white people, career, & students, condos dogs & bikes, - no children, no folks sitting on steps conversing. Just new people for this new city called Phila/ The Land of the Gentry

Which I guess includes me

Joan Bunting

02.20.2020

Heaven

                  Heaven is where I want to be, when I leave

this troubled world.

                  Where peace, joy, and happiness lies

with gates made of pearls. 

                  There are thousands and thousands of angels there

singing praises to the Lord.

                  And I’ll eagerly join The choir where we’ll all

be on one accord.

                  There’ll be no more crying, dying heartbreak or

pain.

                  There will only be peace in heaven where my

Jesus reign.

                  Just to see His face, kneel at his feet to give

praise and thanks for All He’s done for me,

                  For saving my soul, for making me whole, for

dying on Calvary.

As always, keep in touch with the important people in your life, especially the older buds. If you can't be there in person, please call them, email them, or message them on social media. If they're using teleconferencing or remote events for the first time, give them a call and help them set things up. Check in on them to see how well they're getting used to these programs.
You can share your older buds' stories through our portal right here, and you can volunteer as a transcriber (completely remotely) by emailing us at info@bestdayofmylifesofar.org. If you're an older bud yourself, you can share your story through this portal right here. And if you're just plain passionate about supporting older buds and ending senior isolation, then like us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and share links to your favorite stories. And check us out on 6ABC news, too! Thanks for reading.

Curated by Caitlin Cieri

New Transcriber (José and Ann)

Good news everyone! We have a new transcriber for Best Day who is working on our backlog of stories. This means that more recent stories will be posted on the blog more quickly. To celebrate, I'd like to show off the two most recently transcribed stories:

José Dominguez

02.20.2020

Sofia Teaching Her Granpa (That’s Me)

Last year at the beginning of spring I was taking Sofia my granddaughter ( 4 years old) to her school at 8:30a.m., I was in a hurry because I had to arrive at 9:00. So we initiated our drive walking to the east to 20^th street.  After walking several steps Sofia suddenly stopped herself.  “What happen?  Why do you stop?”  I told her.  “Look Pepe look on the sidewalk.”  And I saw a little bird laying death, the eyes closed, lying on its back legs crimped, so small that almost was unnoticed, to me, but not to Sofia.

“Come on let’s hurry!” 

“No Pepe, tell me what happened to him?”

“I don’t know perhaps he was very old, or was hit by a car, or had some illness, how am I going to know?”

“But we can not let him there.” 

“What? Do you want to take it with you?”

Her face was transformed and in her eyes I saw the trace of tears.

“No I will not move” she concluded. 

“Ok let me throw it to the garbage” I replied.

What?  “No Pepe, no I don’t want to”

“Then what can we do?”  Her sad face turned into a very serious gesture and she said:

“My mom told me that flowers grow beautiful when the soil that surround them is rich of plant food, and mom told me that when you bury animal corpses in it the soil becomes food for the plants.”

“Meaning what Sofia?”

“Well we can take the little birdy into our tree pot near the flowers so they will grow beautiful.“

Solemnly I took the corpse and Sofia helped me to give the little fellow a decent burial.  When all was done we continue our trip to school.  She was very happy and didn’t stop speaking about the birdy, the possible death causes, how the flowers were to be fed and at one point she stopped and solemnly told me “You know Pepe, that little bird is going to help also the butterflies because if our flowers become beautiful with birdy they will feed many butterflies, I’m so happy.”

 

Ann Von Densen

02.20.2020

Life of Toby

This is the story of Toby, a beagle-pug mix who was adopted by my daughter Kerry from Morris Animal Refuge in 2009.  It soon became apparent that Toby enjoyed attention and affection from females only when we were sitting on the grass in Rittenhouse Square.  While tail wagging at the women who approached him, he quickly ran behind Kerry and started shaking when a man approached in the same way.  Obviously, two year old Toby’s interactions with men had been less than kind.  Around this time, Kerry started dating Gabe.  Eventually, Gabe became the first man that Toby wagged his tail for.  Being a believer in doggie instinct, I took this as a positive recommendation and was quite happy when Gabe & Kerry became engaged As time went on, I began to think of Toby as Buddha-Dog.  He had a calm nature, happy to sit up straight, slowly moving his head back & forth as he observed his environment.  If you started petting him he would slowly lean into you as if he was returning the affection

Then, my grandson Max arrived and suddenly Toby went down a rung or two on the family ladder.  Taking it all in stride, Toby gently sniffed the tiny human who now occupied his former place on the couch.  Soon, he’d sleep beside Max on the couch & the floor.  Then as Max gained mobility & began crawling over, beside & next to Toby, he would calmly wag his tail.  As years passed & Max gave Toby full body hugs & began to pretend Toby was a pony instead of a dog, Buddha dog continued to take it in stride as dog & boy became best friends.

A few more years past & Toby, now 12 years old began to have health issues- the biggest of which was failing eye sight.  But as usual, Toby soldiered on & figured out the routes from living room to kitchen, dining room to stairs & front door to the corner hydrant.  Max & I began playing “find me Toby” in which we would clap & yell find me Toby!  until the dog happily sniffed his way to our feet receiving dog treats & hugs in returns.

In the past few months Toby’s health deteriorated quickly & Kerry & Gabe tried to prepare Max for the inevitable.  Casually, he would tell me, “Toby is going to die soon, and when he does I’m going to get a fish."

But, reality bites, and last Tuesday night Toby died at home as Gabe, the first man he ever trusted held him.  Max found out the next day & apparently cried thru bedtime.  When I saw him the day after he was still sad but was resuming 5 yr old activities When I saw him yesterday he asked me if I’d like to meet his new fish, Circle.  Life goes on, but I’m sure Max will always remember his first dog Toby with love. 

Also, you might have noticed a picture of one of the older buds above. That's a Socially Isolated Senior Selfie!
I'm going around asking older buds to send their selfies to keep in the spirit of our usual Best Day workshops. Take a page from their book and keep in touch with the important people in your life, especially the older buds. If you can't be there in person, please call them, email them, or message them on social media. You can share their stories through our portal right here, and you can volunteer as a transcriber (completely remotely) by emailing us at info@bestdayofmylifesofar.org. And if you're just plain passionate about supporting older buds and ending senior isolation, then like us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, and share links to your favorite stories. Thanks for reading.

Curated by Caitlin Cieri